8 Effective Ways to Deal with Emotional Baggage
What’s weighing you down? Is there anything reminding you of your past failures or circumstances? Can you pinpoint anything holding you back?
It’s time to clear out the physical and emotional baggage so you can move on intentionally with these 8 Effective Ways to Deal with Emotional Baggage. Choose to get rid of past regrets or painful memories.
Emotional baggage is the result of our experiences which are negative and hurtful, and the grudges we hold or the resentment we feel. It can be childhood trauma that holds you back from being your true self and makes it difficult to move forward and enjoy success in life.
Past experiences that are hurtful and past trauma can creep into your present life and affect your relationships, career, reactions to stress, how you make decisions, or how you think about yourself. It’s like carrying around physical baggage which weighs you down and drains your energy.
These 8 Effective Ways to Deal with Emotional Baggage will lead to freedom, allow you to move forward in life, reach your full potential, live the life you’ve always wanted, and bring overall happiness to your life.
Springtime = Spring Cleaning!
I love and appreciate springtime because it means SPRING CLEANING!! It is a season full of decluttering our houses, eliminating the junk that’s been piling up, sorting through clothes that kids have outgrown, and donating toys no longer played with.
It’s a season full of cleaning all the nooks and crannies: window washing, scrubbing floors, washing walls. All the places we knowingly neglect on a daily, weekly, or even monthly basis.
Instead, we wait until the “right” time to get it all done. It just compiles until that time comes and we can no longer stand the build-up.
There’s one more type of cleaning I highly recommend every season but more so this season, and that’s letting go of emotional baggage that may be holding you back. The baggage of the past holds us captive from our future.
Springtime is the perfect time to dive into this concept. It’s a time to refresh and renew our houses. Why not make it a time to refresh and renew ourselves too?
What is emotional baggage?
Emotional baggage refers to memories, negative thoughts, unresolved emotions, fear, stresses, and feelings from past experiences or past relationships. It stems from not dealing with residual emotions and not expressing your feelings in healthy ways.
It’s usually a result of traumatic experiences such as emotional abuse or loss of a loved one, unresolved childhood issues, an abusive relationship, bullying, a bad breakup, or betrayal by a loved one.
It can also be caused by regret from making a mistake, not taking an opportunity, or experiencing failure.
You know when someone has unresolved issues through their actions which may include self-blaming, fatigue, withdrawal from social activities, depression, irritability, anxiety, blaming others, difficulty concentrating, or prolonged sadness.
It can also manifest in various such as alcohol and substance abuse, road rage, eating too much, or outbursts of tears or anger sometimes to something small. You can become very defensive, have difficulty trusting people in relationships, and hold onto past situations.
When you have emotional baggage it weighs you down, stops you from achieving your goals and dreams, and affects your everyday functioning and overall well-being. This makes it difficult to live in the present moment and make the right decisions.
These painful emotions affect you physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually. Emotional baggage can cause headaches, tight shoulders, or muscle tension.
If you are ready to lose the baggage of the past, move forward with the future, and crush your goals, then you are in the right place! I’ve focused on some key principles to keep a positive mindset and continue moving forward despite the baggage you’re carrying.
Wandering for 40 Years
Did you know that dwelling on the past can keep us from our Promised Land? The Israelites wandered the wilderness for FORTY YEARS because they were stuck in the past. Did you know that the trip should have only taken them about forty days?
They began looking back at their time as Egyptian slaves, but with rose-colored glasses, and they figured it wasn’t so bad. They had “provision” after all.
Justification about the brutal life they survived in Egypt happened all over the place. Their minds tricked them into remembering the past as more pleasurable than it was rather than taking responsibility for their future and stepping into God’s call and promises for their lives.
As I’ve been reflecting these past few months, it hit me that the worst part about the baggage of the past is it holds us captive from our future.
8 Effective Ways to Deal with Emotional Baggage
Dealing with emotional baggage is one of the most important things you can do in life. It improves your mental, spiritual, emotional, and physical health and helps you experience overall happiness. The sooner you address the emotional burden you’re carrying the easier it will be to manage.
The good news is as you let go of past experiences, you get to welcome new things and write a new story about yourself. You can decide what your story is from this point onwards. Are you ready for the journey? Let’s dive in!
Acknowledge the emotional baggage
The first step to dealing with unresolved emotions is to acknowledge their existence. Identify past situations, hurts, or a traumatic event that caused you pain.
Reflect on the negative emotions from these experiences and how they likely affect your current relationships, reactions, and attitudes. When you do this, you begin to work through the emotions in healthier ways.
Identify the root cause of the emotional baggage
The next step to handling old baggage is to go back and understand where it comes from. Were you neglected or abused as a child? Or you went through different experiences in adulthood which may include a divorce, a toxic relationship, or a horrible car accident in which you were retrenched unexpectedly?
This emotional pain can cause fear and anxiety in the present moment where you’re constantly worried about being hurt again.
The things that happen to you as a child can affect you for a long time and you may even blame yourself for it all but the reality is you didn’t have the tools, strength, or maturity to handle them at the time.
Once you identify the source, you need to ask yourself if it’s still true and relevant. If not then you need to then make a conscious decision to start the journey of healing from the pain and to let it all go.
Be patient with yourself
Dealing with unresolved trauma, difficult emotions, old habits or negative feelings should not be rushed. Healing and shedding emotional baggage takes time so it’s important to be patient with yourself.
You may feel stuck, frustrated, hit a roadblock, or even default back to old patterns that stall your progress but remember this doesn’t mean you’re failing. It takes courage to learn how to deal with negative baggage but it’s a journey so don’t rush yourself.
The truth is we all have past and emotional wounds but they don’t define us. Be kind to yourself, don’t say something you wouldn’t say to a friend, and have self-compassion. This leads to accepting yourself and engaging in healthy relationships too.
Work through the trauma and memories
These unprocessed emotions don’t just go away. It’s important to take the time to work through the trauma you’ve gone through.
Feel the grief and acknowledge that you may never get the life you wanted or feel you deserved. When you allow yourself to feel the pain, you accept reality, start to free yourself from the past, and are ready to move forward and achieve your dreams.
Work through the memories that are attached to the emotional baggage so you can start to let of the baggage itself.
You can do this by engaging in practices like meditation, prayer, or journaling to work through your emotions and remind yourself of your strengths. It helps you reflect on what you can control, your beliefs, and any old trigger that’s affecting you.
Journaling helps you develop gratitude for what you have. Even if you don’t have time, start with journaling for 5-10 minutes. It’s a healthy way of coping with different types of emotional baggage.
The goal of all this is to go through an emotional release and live a happier and healthier life.
Learn to Forgive
Unforgiveness is one of those heavy burdens that we carry around and can be difficult to let go of. Forgiveness is a journey that you embark on for your mental and emotional health.
Reflect on who you need to forgive. Sometimes it’s yourself, others, or both. Whatever happened doesn’t define who you are.
Forgiveness allows you to become free and move forward without old emotional baggage.
Let go of the Past
For the sake of your emotional health, your past mistakes and experiences that hurt you should stay in the past. Being present at the moment is important because it allows you to move on toward your goals and dreams.
Allow yourself to feel the pain of what happened, but then let it go. Learn the lessons from the failure you experienced, forgive yourself, and move on.
Letting go is one of the hardest things you can do for your healing. It doesn’t mean you forget the actual event but you release the hold and weight of it on your life. This is a process that takes time but it’s necessary.
It frees you and allows new and positive experiences to come into your life.
“You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk.”
— Louise Smith, female NASCAR racer
Be honest about your past
Maybe you’re in a new relationship that’s going well yet you find out lashing at your partner for no apparent reason. This could be due to the baggage of a previous relationship and you feel you need to defend yourself and avoid getting hurt.
It’s important to find someone you trust to open up about these real issues. It could be a family member or friend. Share your feelings with them and what you’re through.
When you’re ready, take a bold step and open up to your new partner so they understand where you’re coming from. It will help strengthen your relationship.
Honest conversations can also be done with your children when they’re old enough to understand or a manager at work if it’s a safe environment. It helps to build trust and healthy relationships.
Seek professional support
There are times when you’re having a hard time healing from emotional baggage and you realize you need professional help.
A therapist, mental health professional, or social worker can offer a safe space to explore your emotional responses and how they link to the root of your current issues, offer valuable insights, and help you with coping strategies. This helps you address issues in a healthier way which is key for your healing journey.
My Personal Story of Holding onto Baggage From the Past
There was a time when I slipped on the ice running right before Christmas, which messed my ankle up hardcore. I had to endure surgery, and the injury sidelined me for months.
I had a long road of recovery ahead and worked to gain mobility and strength back into both my foot and ankle. Not only did I lose all of the muscles in my calf and thigh, but I also lost all of it in my foot, and it’s a couple of sizes smaller than my left one!
I held onto my crutches way too long, and they held me back from healing as quickly as I could have. Keeping baggage from the past can have the same effect.
Related post: “What is your crutch?”
Throughout my injury, some key resources aided me in my daily life:
- I had CRUTCHES to support me, which were vital whenever there were stairs involved.
- A friend lent me a SHOWER BAG for my leg initially after my surgery so that my cast didn’t get wet. That was so much easier than figuring out how to tie a bunch of plastic bags together or saran wrap my entire leg every time!
- Then there was the SHOWER CHAIR which was a complete lifesaver. To be honest, I may have gone days or weeks without bathing otherwise!
- The BOOT, though extra uncomfortable, stabilized my ankle so it wouldn’t get bumped or be messed with.
- I had my SCOOTER to get around easier and have access to my hands (I loved and miss that basket that was on the front of it!)
As helpful as these resources were to me throughout my injury, when I began the journey to walk again, I realized that I needed to be willing to let go of each of these items, one at a time, otherwise they would just hold me back. I no longer wanted to dwell on the injury, but rather I wanted to focus on the recovery.
In doing so, I also had to rid myself of the trauma I held onto. Paranoia set in, and I didn’t even want to walk around for fear that I would slip and fall again.
It made me a crazy mom for a while too always cringing when my kids would run or walk on an uneven surface, or just play like they normally did! Trauma is real, and we need to be willing to face it to let it go. If we don’t let it go, we’ll remain where we are.
What’s weighing you down? Is there anything reminding you of your past failures or circumstances? This past trauma and negative experiences can affect you through life, relationships, and your career.
Choose to get rid of past regrets or painful memories so you can reach your potential and live the life you’ve always wanted. It’s time to shed your emotional baggage so you can move on intentionally.
There are 8 Effective Ways to Deal with Emotional Baggage which include acknowledging the baggage, identifying its root cause, being patient with yourself, working through the trauma, forgiveness, letting go of the past, being honest, and seeking professional support.
As you embrace this season, are you ready to do some spring cleaning of yourself? Are you ready to dig deep inside and draw out that baggage, whether emotional or physical? Can you let go of the past so you can embrace your future?
Don’t wander in the wilderness for 40 years when your Promised Land may only be 40 days away. The past can’t change, but you can change your future.
Red Hot Accountability Club
You have your goals in front of you! You may even have a good strategic plan to follow to achieve them! But you’re feeling a little lonely in the online space and sick of the hustle culture telling you to do more.
If so, then the Red Hot Accountability Club might be just what you need!
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If you are looking for a positive online community and group coaching experience, come hang out with us in the Red Hot Accountability Club!
